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@sidekickplayah@lemmy.blahaj.zone to 196@lemmy.blahaj.zone • 1 year ago

Two Sentence Rule

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Two Sentence Rule

lemmy.blahaj.zone

@sidekickplayah@lemmy.blahaj.zone to 196@lemmy.blahaj.zone • 1 year ago
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  • @DogWater@lemmy.world
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    27•1 year ago

    For the people who don’t know cyanide supposedly smells or tastes like almonds.

    • @Baalf@lemmy.world
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      5•
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      1 year ago

      I thought it was arsenic.

    • @BreadOven@lemmy.world
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      3•
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      1 year ago

      HCN smells like burnt almonds. Not sure about the taste.

      Edit: bitter, not burnt.

    • Rin
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      10•1 year ago

      They smell like bitter almonds, which smell very different than the sweet almonds most people are used to. https://youtu.be/WYagO-nup6c?si=E_O44PHdOrSZanX3

      • @PipedLinkBot@feddit.rocksB
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        2•1 year ago

        Here is an alternative Piped link(s):

        https://piped.video/WYagO-nup6c?si=E_O44PHdOrSZanX3

        Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

        I’m open-source; check me out at GitHub.

  • @darkpanda@lemmy.ca
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    69•1 year ago

    Why would he slide the pin across the floor? That’s the real horror.

    • Cris
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      30•1 year ago

      To advertise to her he’s gonna blow himself up. She’s already got the cyanide, he’s still gotta make a statement

  • @unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de
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    187•1 year ago

    Thats gotta be the worst one i have seen so far wow. Whats the opposite of a punchline?

    • @Potatos_are_not_friends@lemmy.world
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      29•1 year ago

      Reminds me of the worst opening line contest.

      https://www.bulwer-lytton.com/

      2023s winner:

      She was a beautiful woman; more specifically she was the kind of beautiful woman who had an hourlong skincare routine that made her look either ethereal or like a glazed donut, depending on how attracted to her you were.

      • @retrieval4558@mander.xyz
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        20•1 year ago

        I unironically like this

    • LucasWaffyWaf
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      3•1 year ago

      I call it non-medy

      • @unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de
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        2•1 year ago

        thank you :)

      • @PipedLinkBot@feddit.rocksB
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        1•1 year ago

        Here is an alternative Piped link(s):

        non-medy

        Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

        I’m open-source; check me out at GitHub.

    • @ProgrammingSocks@pawb.social
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      44•1 year ago

      It’s called an anti-joke and I found it funny. It was obviously set up that way by the poster.

      • @unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de
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        6•1 year ago

        Nah turns out its actually a very smart joke, see Blue_Morpho’s reply and my follow up.

        • @DogWater@lemmy.world
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          3•1 year ago

          Anti jokes are capable of being smart. Lmao

          • @unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de
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            3•1 year ago

            Usually anti jokes are funny due to a lack of punchline, but this joke does actually have a functioning punchline and subversion of expectation. It just doesnt work as well if you dont get that the almond bit is about poison.

    • ComradeSharkfucker
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      50•1 year ago

      Cyanide smells (and maybe tastes?) like almonds. For people aware of this there is a subversion of expectation. It isn’t particularly good joke but taken satirically it’s alright.

      • Laura
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        4•1 year ago

        I have tasted it

        it smells like it but it tastes like lye without the sodium taste

        • Python
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          4•1 year ago

          but what does lye taste like?

          • @funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works
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            3•1 year ago

            salty cyanide duh

      • @greedytacothief@lemmy.world
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        7•1 year ago

        Smells like bitter almonds, which smell like bleach.

        https://youtu.be/WYagO-nup6c?si=WdDJy3PP1yDw8wAl. (I really hope I’m remembering the contents of this video correctly, because if I wasn’t, that would be embarrassing, but I don’t have the time to check right now)

        • @PipedLinkBot@feddit.rocksB
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          1•1 year ago

          Here is an alternative Piped link(s):

          https://piped.video/WYagO-nup6c?si=WdDJy3PP1yDw8wAl

          Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

          I’m open-source; check me out at GitHub.

      • @summerof69@lemm.ee
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        3•1 year ago

        What’s the purpose of the grenade then? He poisoned her, then blew up with a grenade. Why?

        • @Alice@beehaw.org
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          3•1 year ago

          It’s supposed to be a one-two punch. You’re expecting him to kill her with cyanide, but it turns out you were mistaken! Then he kills her anyway

          This kind of joke can totally work in a well-paced comedy, but not a two sentence horror. It’s a stretch to do it in two sentences.

        • @PsychedSy@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          6•1 year ago

          There was no poison. You’re supposed to think she’s poisoned, but he meant the grenade.

          • @summerof69@lemm.ee
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            1•1 year ago

            That’s some Nolan shit.

    • 🔍🦘🛎
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      9•1 year ago

      How are you on 196 and unfamiliar with shitposts

    • @spujb@lemmy.cafe
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      10•1 year ago

      naw this is gold

    • @nxdefiant@startrek.website
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      30•
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      1 year ago

      hugpoint?

    • @EdibleFriend@lemmy.world
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      3•1 year ago

      I would say the opposite of a punchline is throwing a grenade at a motherfucker

    • @Frozengyro@lemmy.world
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      5•1 year ago

      It’s like the Bulwer-Lytton (writer known for terrible cliche writing, who people intentionally mimic in jest) of two sentence horror.

    • verdare [he/him]
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      3•1 year ago

      I genuinely thought it was hilarious. The first sentence is the setup, while the second delivers a misdirection and finishes on an absurd conclusion.

    • @verdigris@lemmy.ml
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      82•1 year ago

      It’s an anti-joke. I love it.

      • @voracitude@lemmy.world
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        27•1 year ago

        For real, this is gold. Read in Norm Macdonald’s voice for maximum comedic effect.

      • @barsoap@lemm.ee
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        13•1 year ago

        Two go through a tunnel. Says the third to the fourth: You, I think we’re five. Says the sixth: I don’t get it.

    • @Blue_Morpho@lemmy.world
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      194•1 year ago

      I think it’s a reference to cyanide smelling like almonds. In particular I remember a Jodi Foster movie The little Girl who lives down the Lane where Jodi poisons a rapist. He says, “It tastes like almonds.” as he drinks the tea. Jodi Foster says, “It’s the almond extract.” knowing it’s the cyanide.

      So the punchline is setup to be something about poison but gets subverted by the hand grenade.

      • @iheartneopets@lemm.ee
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        35•1 year ago

        Oh I got the cyanide reference. Still sucks as a two-sentence horror. Would better suit the plethora of antijoke subs.

        • @TheTetrapod@lemmy.world
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          8•1 year ago

          It reminds me of all the dumbass TSH posts that only exist to explain Reddit fun facts, like rabies causing hydrophobia.

      • @unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de
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        47•
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        1 year ago

        Theeeere u gooo. And now i look stupid :D Thank you for enlightening us!

        Found the clip for anyone interested: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bds6OYX85gA

        Tiny detail, its “the almond cookies”

        • @DAMunzy@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          3•1 year ago

          AL-mond cookies.

        • @donio@lemmy.world
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          5•1 year ago

          And Downfall has a scene for the second half of the joke. (Warning, while it’s not graphic you may not want the scene in your head)

          • @damnthefilibuster@lemmy.world
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            1•1 year ago

            Hoo boy that was fucked up.

          • @PipedLinkBot@feddit.rocksB
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            2•1 year ago

            Here is an alternative Piped link(s):

            scene

            Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

            I’m open-source; check me out at GitHub.

  • @mindbleach@sh.itjust.works
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    2•1 year ago

    Kinda like the end of Psycho II.

    “You sure you won’t have a sandwich?” SPANG

  • @BreadOven@lemmy.world
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    22•1 year ago

    Plot twist, his wife was a creature.

    • 🔍🦘🛎
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      3•1 year ago

  • @Blue_Morpho@lemmy.world
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    5•1 year ago

    deleted by creator

    • @AdmiralShat@programming.dev
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      1•1 year ago

      This comment said:

      I think it’s a reference to cyanide smelling like almonds. In particular I remember a Jodi Foster movie The little Girl who lives down the Lane where Jodi poisons a rapist. He says, “It tastes like almonds.” as he drinks the tea. Jodi Foster says, “It’s the almond extract.” knowing it’s the cyanide.

      So the punchline is setup to be something about poison but gets subverted by the hand grenade.

    • @ProgrammingSocks@pawb.social
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      7•1 year ago

      Well, to be precise, certain types of almonds. Actually, the reason those species of almonds taste/smell like cyanide is actually because they contain higher than normal amounts of cyanide, so really, it’s cyanide that tastes like cyanide.

  • ComradeSharkfucker
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    25•1 year ago

    One of the best 2 sentence horror stories i’ve read

  • @Baalf@lemmy.world
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    10•1 year ago

    Doesn’t arsenic supposedly taste like almond?

    • @OldWoodFrame@lemm.ee
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      6•1 year ago

      I think it’s cyanide but honestly I’ve never checked.

      • @subverted_per@sh.itjust.works
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        5•1 year ago

        Actually I have both, let me go check it real quick.

        • @myusernameis@lemmy.ca
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          3•1 year ago

          Dude, it’s been an hour already, are you going to let us know or … Oh.

    • Bigfoot
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      17•1 year ago

  • THCDenton
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    68•1 year ago

    2 second horror is gonna be a gold mine when ai movie generators drop

    • @mindbleach@sh.itjust.works
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      1•1 year ago

      Lights Out (2013).

    • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 🏆
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      4•1 year ago

      Isn’t there or wasn’t there a TV series based on Two Sentence Horror already?

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