Over the years, I’ve seen many folk talking about their relationship with femininity and how it relates to their transition and to their sense of identity, of who they are.
I’ve never understood it though. I don’t feel like I have a relationship with femininity, or at least, nothing beyond pragmatic necessity. It doesn’t relate to my sense of identity or who I am. In many ways, it feels like an obligation, rather than a source of empowerment or self understanding.
So, I’m curious how it works for other folk who find empowerment in it. What does it mean to you? How did it help you find yourself? How do you relate to femininity now vs earlier in your life?
Edit - To add some context. I’m 7 years transitioned, and “post transition” for want of a better term. I’m quite comfortable with my own relationship (or lack of it) with femininity. This is more an exercise in trying to understand different perspectives :)
I feel more feminine when I can express myself openly and freely. When I can choose to dress in clothing I feel that not only looks better on my body, but also emphasizes my comfort over all. When I can choose to put on makeup and nail polish to not only enhance my own ‘confidence in’ and ‘appreciation of’ myself, but put other people at ease, look nice and put-together, and express myself in quiet ways with how I decorate my body that allow me to show my creativity, spirit and personality.
I feel more feminine when I can connect with people and help them feel better, do better and live better. When I can express my love freely and openly and not be derided as seeking sex or pleasure for the immediate moment. When I can explore my social relationships with people and develop and grow them to their maximums without being accused of ill intent, or agenda.
Undoubtedly there are deeper depths of femininity I have yet to explore; and I look forward to doing so, to surrendering myself to femininity as much as I feel I can as I transition and become what I should always have been.
What you’ve said in your second paragraph resonates so much with me and has helped reaffirm that I’m on the right path. Thank you.
