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The Picard Maneuver to Funny@sh.itjust.works • 1 year ago

The man can’t help himself

lemmy.world

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The man can’t help himself

lemmy.world

The Picard Maneuver to Funny@sh.itjust.works • 1 year ago
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  • @Lmaydev@programming.dev
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    76•1 year ago

    Maybe she doesn’t want her deck to smell like piss

    • @Kusimulkku@lemm.ee
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      2•1 year ago

      He is pissing off the deck. And no the ground won’t start smelling like piss from that lol

      • slazer2au
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        10•1 year ago

        Depends where the last few drops go.

        • @tetris11@lemmy.ml
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          4•1 year ago

          I imagine there’s a racoon hiding underneath the boards, just lying there with its mouth open, waiting

        • @Kusimulkku@lemm.ee
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          17•1 year ago

          You’d have to have quite a lot of last few drops to smell up the place. Or some ridiculously potent piss.

          • @RealFknNito@lemmy.world
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            5•1 year ago

            I’m now imagining him getting bottles of concentrated piss and pouring it off the deck in the middle of the night to deter predators.

          • Pyr
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            6•1 year ago

            Not if he does it every night. A few drops after a few weeks is a fair bit and wood soaks up liquid pretty good.

            • @tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip
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              10•1 year ago

              Wood for an outside deck isn’t going to be soaking up much liquid, or the deck would turn to shit after a couple rainstorms. It’s probably pressure treated

          • @FreakinSteve@lemmy.world
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            7•1 year ago

            Have you ever seen a public urinal?

            • @Kusimulkku@lemm.ee
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              4•
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              1 year ago

              No of course not. Please elaborate. Do they get similar amounts of users or something else that’s comparable?

              • @Guntrigger@feddit.ch
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                4•1 year ago

                I’m now more interested in how you’ve never seen a urinal.

                • @Kusimulkku@lemm.ee
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                  8•1 year ago

                  Bless your heart

                  • @Guntrigger@feddit.ch
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                    1•1 year ago

                    Now I’m even more intrigued: a Finnish name, but deep south US vernacular.

                  • @FrostyTrichs@sh.itjust.works
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                    7•1 year ago

              • @FreakinSteve@lemmy.world
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                0•1 year ago

                They all have misses and drips all around them. It’s such a simple skill that men can’t master even when an entire industry was built to accommodate them.

                • @Kusimulkku@lemm.ee
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                  2•1 year ago

                  But you are blasting piss off the porch, the direction is away from you. Almost all of the splatter is gonna end up on the lawn, where you’re pissing anyway.

    • cheesymoonshadow
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      30•1 year ago

      Or the plants to die. Large shrubs can be expensive to replace.

      • @some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org
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        4•1 year ago

        Ok, just piss in the corner then.

      • @PeePantsMcgee@lemm.ee
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        3•1 year ago

        I finally stopped peeing off the porch when I killed 2 rose bushes. Now I walk 2 steps off the porch and kill the grass

    • @RagingRobot@lemmy.world
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      16•1 year ago

      Weird

      • @tetris11@lemmy.ml
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        6•
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        1 year ago

        I know… it’s pretty much written into marriage vows, “till death do us part or one of us stops pissing from the deck”. She needs to fulfill her duties and start joining him at night on the deck

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